What My Son has Taught Me

Being the mother of a Special Needs child has been challenging to say the least. It's funny that what becomes normal to you is crazy to others. Chaos was a constant in my house as my boys grew up. Tantrums were an everyday occurrence. Noise was abundant with boys running around a small 2 bedroom trailer, doors slamming as they darted outside to explored. Injuries were bound to happen and yes they did, quite often, mostly to my youngest son, who trusted his older brother's inventive nature.

So many times I would hear a yell and just knew that someone was hurt, or taped to a wall, or put in the dog kennel. Broken bones, black eyes, bumps, bruises were all part of raising my boys. So as a mother of boys you become immune to these incidents. Us mothers of boys are tough, we have to be or we would end up with a nervous breakdown. Now in saying all this I sure it sounds no different than any other family with boys. But there were a few differences with mine.

My oldest son with disabilities was very different in his approach to problems. No being able to control his emotions added stress to his days. Expressing himself usually ended up with someone getting hurt. This, of course, caused difficult situations both at home and with friends. One thing that stood out to me was that my son never held a grudge, he saw every day as a new day with new ideas and new adventures. Yesterday's worries were not around. To me, this was an amazing gift. Which allowed me to see things differently. So as I would put myself to bed at night I would not linger on the days events. Just like my son I started seeing life through his eyes. Not to take things for granted, see each day as a gift and a choice.

Now this wasn't easy for me to do, each day was a challenge, to not hold a grudge wasn't easy. As time went by it got easier. I see now what a gift he gave me. To be able to forget and forgive the past and try to make every day a fresh start. If only everyone could embrace this idea the world would be such a different place.

There are still times that I worry, that never changes, still times I choose to think negative instead of taking the high road. But ultimately it is up to me how I choose to feel about everything I do and how the people around me treat me. Having this choice is empowering, and can bring happiness, my son, has the right idea, who wouldn't choose to be happy. What do you choose?